Forgiveness: The Great Illusion

I completely understand that this is a pretty bold and, very likely a highly controversial statement which may be difficult for most people to grasp.  Keep in mind that these are only my opinions, not true or false, simply my perspective.

By definition, opinions are not right or wrong, true or false, they just reflect the way in which one chooses to interpret any given situation, event, feeling, idea, and so on.  Before answering, be sure to fully understand this one concept and really consider all possibilities.  Isn’t everything just an opinion?

If 2 people witness the exact same event, one may say the outcome was bad and the other may say it was good…who’s right and who’s wrong?  Well, neither of them is right or wrong, there are only 2 opinions.  Let’s throw in a 3^rd person who agrees the event was good.  The majority say it’s good and the minority say bad.  Does this make the event good just because the majority of opinions say good rather than bad?  Or, does this just mean there are 3 opinions rather than 2?

Let’s use murder as an example because every time I speak with someone on this topic, they throw in the subject of murder.  In my opinion, murder is wrong, but that’s my opinion.  If everyone shared my opinion, there would be no murders.  Obviously, some people have the opinion that murder is right…and they’re the ones who actually commit the act.

Let’s get back to the topic of forgiveness…I don’t believe in forgiveness.  I believe that forgiveness is simply an illusion created by the ego.  Why would I say something like that?  Could I really be so cruel as to not believe in the forgiveness of sin?

Well, what’s a sin?  Isn’t a sin considered to be a wrongdoing?  If everything is just an opinion then is the existence of wrongdoings even possible? 

When you think about it, to forgive someone is to say “I was right and you were wrong but I am better than you so I’ll excuse you.”  Forgiveness is the act of excusing another for his or her wrongdoing.  This is why I no longer believe in forgiveness.  How could forgiveness be possible if there are no wrongdoings?

I say that forgiveness is created by the ego because it is just a way to create the feeling of being right.  This is part of the ego…the need for the feeling of being right.   No one wants to be wrong, and when the ego is allowed to take control, you may find yourself doing anything and everything in order to avoid being wrong.

Another reason I dislike forgiveness is because forgiveness always involves blame.  When one person forgives another, not only is the forgiver asserting himself or herself as being right, he or she is also blaming the forgivee for a wrongdoing in order to feel right and avoid responsibility.

When you think about it, it’s all about blame…forgiveness is really an act of releasing oneself from responsibility.  When you forgive someone, it re-affirms the idea that you were blaming them for something in the first place.

Here’s another example:

The passenger in a car which is traveling 50mph down a wooded road sticks his hand out the window to feel the wind.  His hand hits a tree and is ripped off…gruesome, I know, but it’s only an example.  Well, he decides to blame the town for allowing the trees to grow too close to the road.  And, while he’s playing the blame game, why not blame his friend for driving too close to the trees?  Of course, he feels better because he found a way to place the guild and blame upon everyone else which makes him right and excuses him from taking responsibility for his actions…even though it was his choice to stick his hand out the window in the first place.

Should he forgive his friend for driving too close to the roadside?  Not in my opinion.  There is nothing to forgive because it was the one-handed man’s choice to stick his hand out the window.

This is why I believe forgiveness to be a creation of the ego…the ego is there to make us feel important and right.  It is just another tool which our ego uses to make us feel right.

Remember, it’s all based on how you choose to interpret a situation…choose wisely.

If you agree with this article, great!  If you were offended then please, forgive me.